Abuse of Powerlessness

We often think of power as the antidote to vulnerability. If only we had more money, more status, more control—then we wouldn’t feel so anxious, so exposed, so powerless. And yet, the paradox is this: even people with extraordinary wealth and authority often act from a deep sense of personal grievance. They may have power, but they don’t feel powerful.

We’re taught that with great power comes great confidence. But—sometimes—it’s quite the opposite.

Consider This

From billionaire investors to corporate giants, many of today’s most powerful figures routinely frame themselves as victims—of the media, regulators, or so-called “cancel culture.” Complaints flood the public sphere not from the struggling, but from the elite. Take Tim Sloan, former CEO of Wells Fargo. In 2018, while testifying before Congress about the bank’s massive fake accounts scandal, Sloan complained that Wells Fargo wasn’t “being given credit for the good work” to remediate the wrongdoing—even as new scandals continued to emerge under his watch, including wrongful auto insurance charges and improper mortgage modifications that led to foreclosures. 

His grievance stood in stark contrast to the actual harm caused to customers, not to mention to his position of extraordinary authority.

Putting it into Play

You don’t have to be a CEO to know the feeling. Leaders at every level can be triggered by criticism, cornered by responsibility, or overwhelmed by pressure. In those moments, even with authority in hand, you may feel anything but powerful.

That’s when the real danger kicks in—because power combined with insecurity often leads to defensiveness and denial, blaming others instead of owning mistakes. It can manifest as overcompensation or bullying, where dominance masks fear. Decisions may become driven more by ego than empathy. And sometimes, it spills out as performative self-pity—seeking sympathy instead of taking accountability.

When you have power, just recognizing the gap between the power you hold and the power you feel can be grounding. The key is to regulate your emotional response—because managing stress, reactivity, and fear is essential to good leadership. Ask yourself, “Am I reacting from the role I hold or the emotion I’m in?” And finally, anchor yourself in purpose. Real power serves others. Reorienting toward impact can help you rise above your own discomfort.

Power doesn’t protect you from feeling weak. But how you handle that feeling—that’s the test of real leadership.